What went wrong...? It was all so perfect, but then we got popular...? I don't understand... We were just playing a few rounds of dare to celebrate... Our album had just sold 400,000 copies, and we were super excited, even if that's not a ton in the music industry. We had a couple pints of some beer Gilbert recommended that morning, but by the end of the night we realized that was a huge mistake for some of us. He was the first one drunk and the last one sober. Lovino and Antonio had brought their fair share of wine, and it was starting to show. I was the only one who, along with my female counterpart, was not completely intoxicated by the end of the night. It was Gilbert's idea to begin with that we have that damned game of dare...
***
"Hey! How about we have a game of dare for four hundred thousand copies?!" shouted the drunk Prussian man. Completely opposed to this, I looked away, shaking my head.
"I don't think that's a good idea Gil..." I spoke nervously, fearing what my boyfriend may do while drunk. He'd never hurt me before, but he'd never been this drunk before around me either...
"Ah, shuddup Roddy! You don't wanna do it go home!" This was rather shocking, and hurtful as well. After the rest of the drunk crowd shouted a chorus of agreement, my female counterpart and I decided to take our leave and let this run its course and come back in about an hour and a half. We both went our seperate ways. I headed back to my residence to work on the piece of music I had started composing that morning, but left it unfinished, a rare thing for me, when Gilbert gave me the news of how many copies we'd sold. We were all excited that morning. That evening...? Not so much. Everything went wrong that night. It fixed itself more or less, but the damage was still done, and what happened still tends to hurt. Every now and then when someone brings it up, it gets me upset again, but it's in the past, and I'd prefer to leave it there...
***
"Hey, why don't we have all of Gil's fans get a kiss from him?!" My good friend Antonio had had way to much wine that night, I see that now, but I had way too much beer in my system to notice, let alone care.
"Hey, Spanich, that ain't such a bad idea! Bring 'em on!" That line. That line almost screwed everything up even more than some things that happened a few days ago did. I regret saying that, but the past is the past. The first few girls came through, and things went just like you may think. Made out with all of them, yes, tongue was involved, smirked like a male stripper and told them I hoped they'd enjoyed. But the next girl who walked through changed that. She and some Thai girl started arguing, and then almost started to fight. I pulled them apart, beginning to find the far edges of sobriety. "Hey ladies, no fightin' okay?" They both still looked pissed at each other, but I didn't know why, I wasn't paying their argument the smallest bit of my attention, nor did I intend to. Things started to change a little bit when one of them grabbed my collar again. I gave her a what-do-you-think-you're-doing look, but she paid no heed, maybe as drunk as I was. She proceeded to kiss me again, but I still didn't object, playing the tongue game yet again, until the Thain girl intervened, which didn't take long at all. She got up and shoved the other girl -whom I don't remember anything about- out of the way and took her place on my mouth. This went back and forth for a little while before Lovino noticed.
"Gil! Give 'em something to remember, eh?"
"Sure thing, Spanich!"
Something in the back of my mind was starting to talk to me. This is wrong. You shouldn't be doing this. Stop. You'll regret it. Don't. and things of the sort, but I couldn't think of a logical reason for them to be speaking to me, so I kept up my behavior. The girl I can't remember spoke up then.
"I gave your stupid friend the idea for this, I want another kiss from you!"
"That's already happened. Multiple times over." She sighed, as if exasperated with me.
"No, those I gave to you and you went along with it! You kiss me now!"
I sighed as I gave in. I was beginning to more or less understand the gravity of what I was doing, but not enough to stop it.
The Thai girl started to get mad again and started trying to pick a fight with the other girl. I eventually pushed both of them out of our hotel room we'd decided to stay in for the next few days somewhere in Alfred's home, when female Austria walked in, quietly closing the door behind her and blushing madly.
"Whaddya need? I just kicked out some random girls and I ain't in a great mood." She looked very nervous and like something was bothering her now that I think on it, but I was still semi-drunk. I drink a lot, so it doesn't take too long for me to sober up.
"M-Mr. Prussia?"
"Ja. What do you need." She walked a little closer to me, grabbed my collar, and kissed me. And, in his flawless timing, my boyfriend walks in.
Lovely.
"G-Gil...?"
***
T-This wasn't happening... I closed my eyes tightly and imagined myself elsewhere, anywhere but here.
Anywhere but where the man I loved was kissing somebody else.
"W-what's going on...? What are you doing...?" He hardly looked at me once he pulled away, but my feminine counterpart stared at me straight on in shock. I was hurt. Understandably, don't you think? "Someone, please tell me what's going on!"
"I was kissing him. It felt rather nice, actually." This person, who was supposedly the exact copy of me in female form, said that to me with a smirk.
She was talking about kissing my fiance while smirking.
"W-what...?" She continued to smirk, which was quite honestly beginning to piss me off.
"I don't see why you're so jealous. I don't think you have any particular reason to be, do you Roderich?"
"I have a perfect reason. We're engaged." That caught her attention, and the look on her face immediately.
"That doesn't change anything. I kissed him and it felt good."
"Stop!"
Gilbert finally spoke here.
"What do you want? I wouldn't suggest an apology just yet, if at all. I may have to hit you and that's not dignified." I thought I saw a satisfying flash of hurt cross his face when I said that. I'd take it back in a heartbeat now, but I meant every word of it then. I walked out of the room, or tried to. My female version caught my arm, and I was too shaken to try and pull away. "Do you want something." I spoke in a monotone, not even turning around.
"Please don't be mad, I didn't want to. It was a dare from today!" I looked to Prussia, glaring fiercely.
"I told you that was a bad idea!" He looked down, possibly trying to look away from me.
"Roddy... Please... I didn't ask for it or anything, she just kissed me..." I was too upset to notice the sadness playing in his eyes then.
"And I bet she's totally the first dare that ended up anything like this." I was almost crying then. I'm rather surprised it took that long, really. But, it did. And the tears didn't wait any longer when he avoided my gaze, which wasn't a coincidence considering the circumstances. "Great. I'm leaving." This time I got out the door and actually out to the sidewalk and walked for a good five minutes before noticing the cloudy skies and sprinkling rain. "How could I not have expected something like that? This is Prussia... Heh. Guess I'm that stupid."
"No you're not."
That caught my attention. I whirled around to see my white-haired fiance, standing about three feet away from me, looking me dead in the eyes.
***
Damn it, damn it, damn it! Why did I let this happen? Why did I suggest that game? Why did I let Roddy's female side kiss me? Why did any of this happen... I swear, I'm not drinking again. Ever. I walked closer to Roderich, but with every step I took, he stepped back.
"What do you want." He spoke from a distance, when I wanted him right here. It wasn't a pretty feeling, although I doubt he felt better.
"What do you think I want? To have you back, for none of this to have happened, for you to not have walked in when you did, or at least given me a chance to explain."
"Tell me something. Why did you even ask me what you did yesterday if all you were going to do was turn around and do," he gestured toward the hotel, then to me, seeming to be at a loss for words. "this! Tell me that!"
"Roderich I didn't want this to happen! Any of it-" Wrong thing to say, and I knew why as soon as it left my mouth.
"Oh, so what else should I know about?" I don't think anyone understood how much I didn't want this to be happening right now. Nobody. Anywhere. No one would ever understand, either.
"...Where do I start?"
***
Where do I start?
Yeah, that doesn't hurt a bit. How much actually happened if you need to ask where you should start? Did you really betray me like that...?
"...Right after I left..." I was really worried about his response, but I needed closure. I doubted highly that we would make it through this at this rate, but I wasn't giving up yet. Gil...
***
I was afraid of that, but if I backed out now I'd probably lose him. Sighing, I started right where his knowledge of things that happened earlier that night ended.
"Right after you left, Lovino suggested that I kiss all the girls who had hit on me since we got here, which was kind of a lot. I was drunk, so I agreed. The first few girls came in, everything went just as you would think it would. I won't go into detail there. So, some girl I can't remember what anything about and a Thai girl came in. I kissed them, blah blah blah, but then they wouldn't leave. They each had their turns kissing me without permission and then arguing about something or other, I was busy not giving two shits to listen. They eventually got to a point where I was sober enough to not want any of this, and they were looking to take it further, so I kicked them out and locked the door. Female you came in about five minutes after that, and she kissed me. Then you walked in, and here we are."
He looked many things. Shocked, hurt, distressed, betrayed, but I couldn't honestly tell you I blamed him for any of that. I deserved whatever he threw at me, especially for casually leaving out everything that happened while he was out yesterday, which was information I wasn't giving up without a fight.
"Wow... How do you plan to fix this one, Gilbert? I don't know if you can..." Those words... They still sting now when I think about that evening, which I try not to do. And what noble thing did I do next to save this most-likely-damned relationship?
I watched him walk away.
He walked away from me, continuing on his way, not looking back once. His head was down and his face was in his hands, undoubtedly crying. He was right, too.
How did I plan on fixing this...?
***
Thailand caught me about half way back to my house. Although I felt like speaking to no one, I let him carry out a conversation with me, and I almost regret that.
"What's wrong Roderich?" I didn't even care anymore. I just wanted to get home, so I answered his questions.
"Gilbert." He looked at me like he wanted to say something but didn't know if he should or not. "Do you have something to say...?"
"Yeah. My best friend was one of the girls who was arguing over him yesterday and she's gone and ditched me with the intentions of doing it again, so I'll just screw with other people's lives now. Did he remember to throw in the part about sleeping with Lovnio? Probably not, huh. Well, I'll be going to the hotel now to screw around some more. See you around." I ran the rest of the way home and crumpled to the ground immediately after shutting the door, just sitting on my knees, to hurt to cry anymore.
***
I saw Thailand come in through the door smirking, and that usually wasn't a good thing, being the professional stalker of our circle of friends.
"What's up Thai-thai?
"Oh, nothing, just probably further messed up your relationship with Roderich." My face paled, knowing full-well what he probably said.
"...What did you say..." He smirked. For God's sake, why would he smirk?!
"I think we both know what I said Mr. Gilbert. Have fun with that one. Well, I'll leave you to try and salvage what little remains of your relationship. Good-bye, see you around."
Do I really need to explain how fast I was out that door?
***
Gilbert walked in the door and nearly tripped over me, but I hardly cared at that point. I wanted to hug him and cry on his shoulder, but he was the reason I wanted to cry.
"It appears that you know you have some explaining to do." I almost didn't want to hear any more of it, but I knew I needed to. We couldn't be together again with this still hanging over us all the time, things just wouldn't work that way.
"Roddy..."
"Refrain from calling me that. And what." I was having an awful time keeping it together, but I wouldn't show that kind of weakness in front of him again.
"That... thing that Thailand told you about... was hardly consensual! He was dared by Thailand himself to do it! I just went with it because Thailand would have my head if I messed this up for him! He's just out to screw up everyone else's relationships because he doesn't have one himself! You've gotta believe me, they'll tell you the same thing! Well, probably not Thailand, but Lovino will! He's with Antonio, remember?"
"What does him being with Lovino have to do with anything? You being with me didn't stop you from that or making out with girls you hardly know!" This one seemed to hit home.
"Roddy..."
"I just told you not to call me that!"
"Fine! Roderich! You know I love you! Do you think I purposed yesterday for no reason? Am I really that stupid in your eyes? Are you going to forgive me or not...?" Against my will, a tear finally slipped out. I opened my mouth to reply when my female self and Lovino practically broke down my door and entered my home. I gave them each their own what-do-you-think-you're-doing look and turned to speak to them.
"Would either of you mind telling me what you're doing in my house?" Lovino had the very unusual for him emotion of concern obviously playing on his features, while my female counterpart looked like she was about in the same state I was. She ran to me and hugged me. I really wanted to push her off, but I didn't have the heart even then to push a crying girl off of me.
"I'm so sorry Mr. Austria! I never meant to cause so much pain for you two! I was dared to do it, I really was!"
"Hey, it wasn't the Prussian bastard's fault, any of this. He was sort of forced to go along with it. The tomato bastard and I are still together, you guys should be too."
I pondered this for a moment, wondering if it really could all be okay again. I definitely wanted it to, but could it really happen...?
***
I felt the little bits of hope spark up as Lovino spoke. Did he really have that kind of power when he was in a good mood...? I looked at him nervously, but we never made eye contact.
"I'm not kidding you guys. You really need to get back together and damn it you will if I have anything to do about it!" Roddy blushed a bit at this, which made me happy for whatever reason. He looked at me, one eyebrow raised as if to ask, "What do you think of this?" I smirked back at him, making my silent answer as obvious as I could. Cracking a small smile in my direction, he walked towards me and looked up, almost expectantly.
"Roderich Eldestein, I'm sorry for what I did. I wish I could erase it all, remove it, and make sure that it never happened, but I can't. And I really, really apologize." I pulled him into a hug, which probably caused him to blush, knowing Roddy like I do. He put his head on my shoulder and hugged me back for a moment before whispering his forgiveness to me. This was when Thailand conveniently burst in the door, having heard the new from... Lovino, who had his phone out texting furiously. Oh dear... I smirked as he walked in. "Hey Thai-thai." He obviously spotted the position I was in at the moment and taken heed to what it meant.
"Now apologize and kiss him Roderich!" Roddy tensed while on my shoulder before lifting his head to look me in the eyes.
"I'm sorry Gil... I forgive you..." He placed his head back on my shoulder before Thailand yelled at him again.
"You forgot the kiss!" Poor Roddy was as stiff as a board now, but ended up lifting his head again anyways. He slowly leaned in closer until I closed the distance and kissed him for just a moment before pulling away.
"Love you Roddy~" But, you can leave it to Thai-thai to ruin a moment.
"Now, what cinema to sell this to first~?" And the rest just goes down into a history of arguing, yelling, and blushing on Roddy's part.
Ich liebe dich, mein liebe~










































































































